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Life in the Waiting

They say that your character isn't made in the big moments of life - it's simply revealed in them. They say, rather, that your character is made in the little everyday, mundane, nothing moments: how do you treat your cat? What do you do in a minor ethical dilemma at the office? Who does your landlord say that you are?

I don't have a cat, I'm still in school, and I live with my parents.

Don't get me wrong - this is one hundred percent NOT a complaint! I've got a lot going on, and I am totally fulfilled, but this is a season of preparation and that means that a lot of the dreams and goals in life right now are like a plane in a holding pattern. I'm about to take off and soar into the unknown, but in the meantime, even the little everyday, mundane, nothing moments aren't what they'll be once I'm airborne. For now, my Life is in the Waiting.

So who will I be in the waiting?

Fearful?      Anxious?      Doubting?      Bitter?    

What about a woman of peace, of trust, or of faith?

What about a woman who can literally "laugh at the days to come"? I love that verse in Proverbs 31. There is a lot in the chapter that I don't even aspire to - I can't spin wool or twist fiber or inspect a field and plant a vineyard - but I do aspire to be so enveloped in the love of God and so trusting of His will for my life that I can literally laugh at the days to come. And I don't mean a laughter of spite or flippancy. I'm talking about deep joy in the face of uncertainty. Joy that says 'I may walk, this morning, into the loss of something I care about or the beginning of a brand new adventure or even the end of my life. Come what may, my future is secure.'

I want to be that woman. One who, during Life in the Waiting, still dreams and grows and pursues the will of God. One who trusts that the timing for her release is determined by a wisdom deeper than her own.

There's a song - it's actually pretty old by now - called Everything by Tim Hughes. It must have been a decade ago, but I had a moment with this song, and I still come back to it like one of those old altars that the Israelites built to remind themselves of where they had come from and what the Lord had done.

Today what I'm remembering is this:

God in my hoping
There in my dreaming
God in my watching
God in my waiting
...
Be my everything
You are everything 

Comments

  1. I loved this read!!! Thank you for your transparency!!! I used this for my devotions today and talked about trusting God in the big and little things...
    Love you Honey!!!
    Dan

    ReplyDelete

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